Women on Leadership & The Gift of Power
A Cog’s-eye view of the evening:
There is still a feeling of inequality in the business space. Men and women will never agree 100% on any single topic, so listening and understanding each other’s needs is paramount for growth.
Believe in your strengths, celebrate the strengths you see in others, and stay above the negativity of those who do not respect the gifts you share.
Don’t try to fit someone else’s idea of what a leader is.
Follow your passion. You’ll need that energy to have the grit to prevail.
The idea germinated early in the summer of 2019. On the brink of celebrating her 10th anniversary with Cog, Lindsey Frimming, Partner and Chief of Innovation, recounted the story of her entrance into the male-dominated world of packaging, printing and design. “I think of all the amazing women leaders I’ve met who, directly and indirectly, influenced how I’ve grown. But is everyone so lucky? Where would I be, if those role models hadn’t been there for me?”
All of us Cogs agreed that was a great direction for our second big COGnitions™ Knowledge-Sharing Series event. Lindsey mentioned the idea in passing to her friend Katie Kinnemeyer of White Paw Ventures, an innovation consultant and facilitator with a track record of successful events fifty miles long. Katie lit up. “Hellooo. That’s what I do, Lindsey.” The symbiosis between the two was magnetic, so there was no stopping them until they had recruited just the right women for their panel.
Within a few weeks, they found not only the perfect panelists, but kindred spirits who jumped at the opportunity to share lessons learned, battles won and lost, and journeys of self-discovery: Lourdes Albacarys, former VP of packaging R&D at Procter and Gamble; Elle Morris, CEO of SnapDragon Brand Design Consultancy; and Lori Campbell, President of The Label Printers and recognized as the 2019 TLMI Converter of the Year. Each mentioned the discovery of a gift she’d had in her from birth, whether compassion, perseverance, willfulness or something else. Learning how to tap that gift and employ it alongside acquired skills made a huge difference in achieving success as a leader.
Lindsey and Katie recognized that as the perfect topic for an evening of discussion. Thus: “Women on Leadership and the Gift of Power.”
My take away from the evening was very empowering: Be curious. Be courageous. Believe in yourself. Be You. — Deb Adams, Founder & CCO, domo marketing
Once again, the venerable Cincinnati Club played host. The always-agile staff had a fully stocked bar and a big table loaded with heavy hors d’oeuvres waiting when the first guests trickled in. By 5:00 p.m. the second floor foyer was buzzing. Nobody was quite sure what they were about to witness, but all of them felt it would be something special.
The group was mostly women and included all ages, from those just beginning careers to those honing careers already in motion. Katie and Lindsey applauded the audience for actually getting seated by the beginning hour (5:30). They had set the seats in groups of three, so the guests naturally formed triads when they sat. Katie asked the members of each triad to talk among themselves for one minute about why they had come to the event. Even though many guests were strangers to one another, their discussions began humming after only a brief, awkward pause.
It was great to hear from three successful women in the industry, all with unique stories and paths to their success. A very energizing evening. — Jody Bergman, Implementation Lead at goDutch.
Katie signaled the end of discussion with the dulcet thwong of a Tibetan singing bowl and the audience, now comfortable with each other, turned its attention to the stage.
Lourdes began the discussion in earnest, after Katie asked her, “When did you first realize you had a natural gift you could share?” Her first boss had told her she was too caring, which dented her confidence, until she discovered what a powerful tool empathy was for building trust and strong teams.
Elle, a damn-the-torpedoes type from the east coast, had the opposite problem. During her early years as a professional, she worked at LPK in Cincinnati, a more reserved, mid-west culture. She had no problem voicing her opinions wherever and whenever. Her boss told her, “Elle, tone it down. You’re a LOT.” As she tells it, “My bosses were good enough to give me enough rope to hang myself.” It didn’t happen overnight, but she learned how to deploy her confidence without ruffling feathers. Successful promotions to higher positions of leadership led to a posting in Singapore. “The bonus silver lining of that,” she explained, “was learning to cultivate business relationships over distance.”
Lori laughed as she told of entering the professional world on the lowest rung of the ladder: the sticker coordinator for The Label Printers. She wanted to be a good team player, but she also wanted more responsibility. Like Elle and against the mode of the day for women in the work force, she challenged her male bosses to let her have a crack at estimating. In her words, “I practically had to pry their cold, dead fingers off their calculators to do it, but they finally gave me my chance.” While her male counterparts were bright and efficient, she discovered she could bring more of a human touch to dealing with customers.
Lourdes agreed that asking for more was difficult but necessary, if she wanted to grow. Through gentle persistence, she became a leading innovation pioneer in Procter & Gamble’s packaging research and development organization.
From barriers to success to tales of empowerment, the discussion was honest and the women were exceptional.
Elizabeth Yerecic, Product Development Lead, Yerecic Label
At that point, Katie broke the room into triads for three minutes to discuss where each person was in their careers and what roadblocks they were meeting. Everyone leapt on the opportunity—no wallflowers there—and the room buzzed with energy.
The consensus was:
Identifying personal gifts takes time, lots of trial and error.
Gifts and skills are different—skills can be learned but gifts are powers we are born with.
What might be considered a “soft” skill, such as empathy, patience, nurturing, etcetera, can be a strong force in business.
A woman from the audience asked the panelists, “How did you bring your gifts to your industry?”
Lori got the room laughing when she admitted she broke into a cold sweat when Lindsey and Katie asked about her gifts. “I have gifts?” What at the time she identified as skills, took decades to hone, but, “Understanding feelings and mood made a huge difference to our work.”
Lourdes convinced the packaging engineers in R&D to give fashion equal importance alongside function when creating packaging.
Elle identified her primary gift as grit. At a time when women were expected to forego their careers for family, only determination and headstrong perseverance would open doors.
I left feeling empowered to apply my unique ‘soft’ skills more assertively at work.
Kathy Chambers, Grants Manager, Cincinnati Zoo & Botanical Garden
Another voice from the audience asked if the women of the panel ever had mentors help them.
For Elle, there were no senior women at LPK who could be a role model for her, although a few upper level males appreciated her being “mouthy.” Once she was leading their P&G business, she found powerful women who were as direct and as opinionated as she was. They proved that her persona could succeed. She also pointed out that younger people can be wonderful mentors, too, by keeping you in touch with new shifts in the zeitgeist.
Lourdes was told by her peers that her soft skills weren’t viable, so she didn’t have a mentor among other women. Fortunately, a male in her Hispanic network outside of work recognized her skills and became a reassuring force behind her.
Lori had a single mom who worked for a privately owned business. She passed on this wisdom: “Decide what you can live with and what you can’t.” The business Lori started in was so insular, it took a long time for her to find mentors beyond its four walls. “But I finally did.”
The Cogs took the microphone for a moment. David Lukshus, President and CEO, shared how a female friend, an independent thinker and doer like his mother, illustrated the traditionally hard skills of men as “hunting” and the soft skills of females as “farming.” Both have their places—and treating each with equal importance creates a new gold standard men should aspire to. Lindsey expanded on all she learned from her fellow Cogs, but emphasized the need to stay tuned in to sources outside one’s immediate workspace.
Elle spoke of the different personalities that make up SnapDragon, and how each recognizes what they know and what they don’t know. One will act as a net when another falls, so each feels supported, even in failure, where the strongest teaching moments live.
Lori identified others in her universe of business associates who had gifts she didn’t have. They all learned from each other. “We all will fail, and that’s okay, as long as we learn.”
Lourdes told of encouraging her employees to take on roles they might not feel comfortable with, at first. “I always let them know they can fall back to where they are, if the move doesn’t work for them. That’s how we built trust.”
The evening inspired me to be more of a mentor to the interns, co-ops, and some of the younger members of my staff.
Karen Boyen, Creative Director, Visionaries + Voices
Thwong. At the sound of Katie’s Tibetan singing bowl, she asked the group at large, “What could you achieve if you stepped fully and confidently into your gift?”
The responses were varied and genuine, if not exactly answers to the question.
Never suppress joy.
Testosterone isn’t always a benefit.
Dissension in a group is necessary only when all aspects of a problem haven’t been considered.
Time for conversation outside of work and home is hugely valuable.
Empathy is definitely a strength, but it can also cause stress from worrying too much about others.
Mothers need to find a balance between the gifts they employ at home and those they employ at work; they aren’t always the same.
For men and women, the car ride to work is excellent time to compartmentalize one’s energies for work, while the car ride home is time to switch gears and prepare to be your “home self.”
Prioritize so you make the choices that fulfill you first and postpone things that can wait.
Take care of yourself first, because if you fall apart, your family, home, and work lives will begin to fall apart.
The discussion shifted when someone asked the panelists, “What does it take to be the exceptional woman who rises beyond her male peers past management positions to being a CEO?”
The responses were emphatic.
Be true to who you are.
Believe you are good enough.
Don’t take no for an answer.
Elle pointed out that the company you’re in might not be the right one in which you can excel. Maybe it’s time for a change. And, “You must put yourself out there, even if you’re not the self-promoting type.”
Lourdes stressed mental toughness. “The farther up the ladder you get, the less candy-coated the feedback you get.” She also compared male attitudes to job seeking with female attitudes. A man with only fifty-percent of the qualifications for a job will often try for the job with the willingness to “see what happens.” A woman, on the other hand, even one with ninety-percent of the qualifications for a job often hesitate, because they lack that last ten percent.
The panelists were one in saying, you must love what you do and put all of your passion into it. If you feel sick in the gut every day, you’re not in the right place. You can’t simply grit your teeth and climb the ladder. You must fit the job once you get there.
The barely interruptive tone of Katie’s gong brought the discussion to an end. She stood and thanked everyone for sharing “and being brave enough to dissent.”
Lindsey, who had sat upright and poised all night, lay back in her chair instead of standing and reciting from her script. “We’re all comfortable enough with each other at this point for me to stay seated, yes?” A swell of laughter told her yes, they were—more comfortable and a bit more liberated in thought than when they arrived.
She thanked everyone for coming and closed with, “I hope the conversation never ends for everyone.”
From what we can tell by the feedback from our guests, the conversation is still very much alive.